#blogchatterA2Z, Infertility

1. Are you pregnant yet?

Are you pregnant ?
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Are you pregnant yet?

Are you pregnant yet? This won’t hit you hard if you are a newly wed bride and just enjoying your honeymoon period of marriage.

But the same question is a strong punch for a woman who is trying hard to conceive and has already earned a label for her existence silently. In hush-hush words some whisper her to be a “baanj” some “barren”. Gifting her a scar that’s etched in her heart forever.

A silent battle that is fought by millions of women all over the world. It’s not a disease but people treat it as if the life ends there. Life after marriage means only to give birth to your progeny, to carry your genes forward.

But what about the emotions that a woman carries when she is dying to have a life within her but nothing seems to happen.

I have gone through all of this for a long period of time. At times used to smile and just carried on. Or crack a joke trying to laugh hard and portray the “strong me” to the world, that I am happy the way I am. Not interested to be a mother now. But frankly, deep down, you are broken but don’t want to confide it to the world.

The worst part of this silent battle is that you self-pity yourself, the worst thing that can happen to a human being. It’s a slow death that society offers you sweetly without even realising it.

The purpose of life is to be happy.

~~ Dalai Lama

But keeping oneself motivated and inspired is also not easy.

Push yourself, because no one else is going to do it for YOU.

~~ Anonymous

Stand up for yourself as the world only knows to push you to a corner. Be like a phoenix who knows to rise from it’s ashes.

So, why to waste our lives on negativity and fill our selves with bitterness.Few activities can always uplift your spirits high. Diversion of thoughts is the best medicine to negate all sarcasm and bitterness that society offers to you.

I followed most of them when I felt extremely low when kith and kin came up with unwanted questions or queries out of concern. These few steps helped me to stay afloat in the most difficult time of my life.

Talking to someone (Vent out call)

When we suppress our emotions it hurts us more than we can imagine even. Venting out your emotions helps in many ways, it doesn’t piles up to burst like a volcano and push you to the abyss of depression. Call your friend or sister anyone who genuinely loves you and cares for you.

Tears are not signs of weakness when they trickle down, they also carry all the negativity along with them. You feel light and relaxed. When you share your grief it’s reduced for sure and many a times pearl of wisdom that we receive stays with us forever as a guiding star.

Read inspiring and positive quotes

This always works for me. Inspirational quotes always boosts my dampened spirits. It works as a magic. Zeal for life is back.

Inculcate a hobby

Hobby a day keeps the doldrums away.

~ Phyllis Mc Ginley

Start from a simple one like gardening, reading a book of your choice, painting, singing whatever you are good at and help you absorb in it completely. You should be at peace and enjoy your hobby.


Buddha Quote

Sarcasm, taunts do take away our mental peace and renders restlessness, only way out is to meditate.

It’s a way of learning how to let go. Meditation helps in purifying the mind and rejuvenates the body.

Life is a roller coaster ride it has its own ups and downs. It’s only your attitude that makes a difference. Either be a victor or become victim of your situation. Choice is yours. Don’t allow others to rule your life be the master of it.

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20 thoughts on “1. Are you pregnant yet?

  1. Such a heartfelt post dear, and I could co relate with this so well. I had an obstetric history of recurrent miscaggiage and my elder one born after 5 years of marriage.. I had gone through this difficult phase you had mentioned here.. great start of series. Looking forward to reading more from your side.

    1. Thanks Surbhi, I was bit apprehensive about this series but then the response that i am getting is quite motivating.

  2. Wonderful post Debi. You know there is research to suggest that tension at home or any kind of stress contributes to inability to conceive. It is always best to let things happen on their own time, without worrying about them.

    1. Yes, Noor, Best is to go with the flow but that doesn’t come easy. I was glad you liked it.

  3. Loved reading your post… It’s not easy every month to face disappointment! Looking forward to reading all your posts in this series

    1. Yes, that’s the reason I say “silent journey” . The pain is gulfed all by self and by not sharing it can push you to depression.

  4. What a beautiful post. Only a person who goes through it will be able to pen it down so well and trust me, not many will understand it. I have gone through this phase so I completely know. I am so glad you are writing your posts on this topic. Looking forward to reading your posts.

    1. Thanks Arushi, your words are so encouraging. As you too have gone through this and I know many won’t be able to relate with this. Earlier I was bit apprehensive then I thought even if one soul is benefitted, I am more than happy.

  5. Very nicely expressed…. Can empathise…. Best solution is to not let the negativity get to you… But yes it’s easier said than done.

    1. Absolutely Ira, getting bogged down is easy but not impossible. To stay afloat is the challenge.

  6. Thats a wonderful insight into your private emotions Debi and as you said it is good to vent! It reduces half the stress. And meditation of course gives u a sense of fortitude to face the storm.

  7. Such a heartfelt post, More power to you dear, I can relate with your story as I have seen my closet one to went all these phases.

    1. Yes, Ruchi my sole intent is that. Do share it with someone who is facing similar struggle.

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